Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Crossroads

I pieced together another 9 patch cross quilt, this time in shades of green, and just like the previous red one shown in my last post, it seems to be asking for lots of that hand-quilting... 


But I am really feeling out of it this past week... fatigued and just general blah-ness. Whenever my energy is low, I prefer working on a very small scale. So, for now I am putting this top aside until I am in a better mood, energy wise, to give it what it wants. Here it is hanging from the curtain in my studio window... what a great pojagi piece it would have made had the seams been stitched differently. (File that thought away for another time!) 


Not exactly sure why the energy is so low, but I have my suspicions... We have been getting youngest ready to head off to college in just a few short weeks, and I am just truly coming to grips that my children really aren't children anymore, and I am about to enter a whole new phase of my life, (not to mention that the next birthday will be #50!) I feel like in the time it takes to turn around and blink, two whole decades flew by. Could it be that I am entering some sort of mid-life crisis?! That sounds so cliche, but me thinks I am! And what really knocks me for a loop is that I'm still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up!

Hope you all are having a good week... and for anyone whose kids are still little, and each day fees like a hundred hours... hug them tight and whatever you do, don't turn around and blink!


22 comments:

RosaMarĂ­a said...

taking a break is always a great option!

the quilt is amazing and your window is so lucky to have that beautiful "curtain"!

Catherine said...

Yours was one of the first blogs I read and I still find it a constant source of inspiration - you may not have figured out what you want to be when you grow up, but you are doing some wonderful and exciting things while you work it out.

Angela said...

50? The best part of your life is still ahead of you!

donna from canada said...

I don't what I want to be either....and I have a few years on you (quite a few). Children, well they are launching themselves as well...enjoy watching.

Donna

Jodi said...

I so feel for you! My "kids" are 26 and 23, and what a crazy, emotional few years it's been! Hang in there, it gets better and more normal. Love your cross quilt!

Unknown said...

Your quilt is beautiful, and I completely understand how you feel. I am 51 and my only child is starting college in a couple of weeks. Her senior year in high school was absolutely wonderful--but I felt myself going through a hard time with all this. It took a couple of months, and this summer I'm just now sort of snapping out of it and feeling like my happy ole self again! Hugs to you! It will all be good.

Annie said...

I can so relate to this post. I'm often dreaming of what I'm going to be when I grow up!

Hoola Tallulah said...

Gosh! When you said you were youngest is of to college, my first thought was "oooh she must've had her kids young" cause you look SO young yourself, and then you say you're 50 on the next birthday? WOW, when I grow up, I want to look like you! This quilt top is gorgeous too x

beth said...

i think of you as being in your 20's or 30's!!!! this is flipping beautiful work. i would love to take a class with you. i love all these seams against the light.

Colleen Kole said...

I was absolutely horrid when I was 49 and almost 50-for a whole year and dreaded my 50th. Dread seems almost a simple word in comparison to how I felt. but the day came and amazingly, I felt no different than I had before. No different at all. except I realized I didn't want to waste a minute or let a minute go by unnoticed for what it was. So, I stopped worrying about and just kept going. And appreciated things a little more.

And kept making things.
I love this piece!

Esch House Quilts said...

Hang in there! I'm sure you'll feel a bit better soon. The crisp fall air usually helps me.

Whatever you decide to be when you grow up, I hope it continues to include your amazing quilts :)

Clare Wassermann said...

A totally gorgeous quilt....calm, reflective greens. Take your time and your energy will seep back.
Mine are quite young and it's hard not having enough time to make art and stitch...I can't imagine it really!

Walden said...

beautiful!

Gina said...

I have five years on you and still don't know what I want to be when I grow up! Hope you feel better soon. I love the colour of that green quilt... just stunning.

Cheryl Arkison said...

I am so glad I read this post tonight. I feel for you, you are describing my fears in 20 years! And having just finished up with two big deadlines I feel like I'm finally enjoying the summer and the freedom of time with my kidlets. No rushing about, and lots of spare time. And all they want are playdates with friends. But I'm even okay with that because I sit back and watch the interactions and that gives me peace. As always, you give me pause in such a good way.

Jenny M said...

I think your feelings are totally natural....I too am struggling, as our daughter, 27 yrs old, has just moved to Scotland on a 2yr work visa, and we live in Australia! But as parents we just have to sit back and let our 'children' stretch their wings and discover the world for themselves. We are proud of her confidence to strike out on her own, but in the middle of the night I wake and my thoughts fly far across the ocean, hoping that she is safe & happy.
A beautiful quilt top...and green is my favourite colour.

Uniquely Yours Creations said...

Sounds to me as if you're going through "The Empty Nest Syndrome" Vic! (went through that) The good side is that you'll have time to rediscover yourself and challenge yourself to new ideas and projects.
And Thank goodness for cell phones!

Anonymous said...

Good heavens woman! Whatever it is that you are feeling is finding its way into your work and that is a beautiful thing!

I'm on the other side of 50 myself. These are strange years indeed. A friend of mine told me that 49 to 51 are the Jubilee Years - take those two years to do something you've never done and see what happens. Why not?

Take care and all the best - Byrd

Pippa said...

Gorgeous quilt! I love how it looks with the light shining through... and I expect I'll never know exactly what I want to be when I grow up ;) I just found out my older sister is pregnant and that makes me feel old! Sigh, life's transitions...

Mandy said...

I too understand your feelings right now. My youngest left home (too early, sadly) last year, and I am finding my feet through the periods of emptiness to find what life will look like without being needed all of the time. You are, then you aren't, just like that, really. The other thing I never anticipated was how I would continue to worry about my children for the rest of their lives. So much adjusting to do. I am 49 too. I keep stitchin', it truly is keeping me sane and focussed. Love to you and all other mums!

Victoria said...

Thanks to each of you for all your wonderfully supportive and understanding comments. Obviously this is something that a lot of have gone through, are going through, or will go through. I wish we could all get together and swap stories over coffee!

Mandy... so true... I never anticipated the whole life long worry thing either. In fact, before motherhood I never worried much at all, (something my kids have a very hard time believing!)

And to Hoola and Beth... My ego and vanity thank you very much!!


Donna S. said...

You are right. I think 50 is the start of a lot of new phases!! This week I will have my last birthday in the 50's. I don't like "this" phase I am in & I hope it passes soon.