Monday, August 18, 2008

Feeling Better


Well, I am feeling much better from my last post. The blues got a bit worse before getting better, but ultimately two things really helped to bring me out of my funk. The first thing was reading the comments left... a heartfelt thank you to those that offered comfort, wisdom, and understanding. I really appreciated all of your words.

The second thing was, I started to zero in on and identify the biggest cause of my sadness. It was feeling like I hadn't done enough with my girls as they were growing up, and longing to go back in time so that I could do it over, and better. So I made a list of all the things I wished I had done. And as I read over my list I began to realize that I HAD done all of the things I had wanted to. And not only had I done them, I had done most of them in spades. I was a hands on, down in the dirt with them, type of mom. I read books with them, I played and explored with them, I cuddled and fell asleep with them... We built forts and painted pictures and took long walks... Sometimes I got mad over stupid things, but I also talked to them, worked things out, said I was sorry, and always tried my best. So enough already with the blues. I had my time as the mother of young children, and I spent it well. Now I get to enjoy this phase of the game, and I am ready to play!


Yesterday we moved eldest daughter, (on the left) into college for her 2nd year. She has a great room, (twice the size of last year's) and a great friend that she is rooming with. Youngest daughter is to my right, she just joined the tennis team and is really looking forward to starting high school this year. I am a very proud, (and happy) mama!

21 comments:

Cicada Studio said...

Your smiles say it all. You've done a great job, Victoria! I'm certain your daughters feel that, too and the pride you feel is reflected in them.

Mrs.French said...

I am so happy you are at peace with where you are as a momma...I am hoping to look to you for advice in the future since you have been through it all with such grace.

Lumpkin said...

i often feel this same way. i think it's a curse of motherhood. we expect too much of ourselves and are so unforgiving when we can't always measure up. i'm glad you're feeling better about it. your girls are beautiful.

please sir said...

I'm so glad you are feeling better! Lovely images in the last post, as well as this one. At least you get to do more decorating right?!

Hey Harriet said...

So glad you're feeling happier & more positive about things. Oh the benefits of list-making eh? I also find it a nice way of sorting things out in my head sometimes :) Your girls are lucky to have you for a mom & it sounds like they enjoyed a wonderful childhood & upbringing! Your role will continue to change but you'll always be their mom. And they'll always need that special love & support that only YOU, as their mom, can give them. And you will certainly enjoy this new phase of the game! Plenty of good fun, sweet times ahead to look forward to!

That is a most beautiful photo of you three lovely ladies :)

hens teeth said...

So pleased you are feeling better about things.....boy it is all so difficult at times!

knittydirtygirl said...

Vicki, what beautiful photo, and a great attitude! XOXO

Sandra Ree said...

Victoria ~ you are as beautiful on the outside as you are on the inside!

The picture of you and your girls say the best thing ~ love

They are as beautiful as their fantastic mom!

One look at them and you know what a good job you have done! :)

RainbowMom said...

Wow! This post really moved me. I would love to see a list of advice that you have for all of us young mom's trying to do the right thing but still sometimes getting lost in the little things that don't matter! I'm also happy that you are feeling better and congrats to your girls as well!! Peace to you and all you love.

Amy C said...

you all look very happy together, what a lovely picture.
Glad you are feeling better you must be an inspiration to them.
Thanks for your honesty - its refreshing to read.

Rosebud Collection said...

So happy you are feeling better..I wanted to write something, but found it very hard to explain..

bunzi said...

your kids are cuties! :) and i'm sure you did a great job.

Jacquie said...

great post. i'm so happy for you. you have two lovely girls!

Uschi said...

I relate so much to your "turbulences", Victoria!
My twins are 18 now and it's a very intensive time just now!
But they will soon be gone and it's allright for me/us now!
I had the same feelings about having spend to few time with them but I decided to concentrate on my own (and my partners) life more and more and so set them free, too!

Jaimee said...

I'm so happy for your new found Happiness! Sometimes it take a short trip down the blues to realize all the good times. Love the photo of you with your girls!!!

High Desert Diva said...

You look happy!

T.Allen-Mercado said...

Look at you! I'm so happy you're feeling better, your daughters are beautiful.

blazedanielle said...

Oh what fun! I love these photos, and your daughters are beautiful! ;) Best of luck to your oldest for another year!! ;) I'm happy to hear that you are filled with joy!

Magdalen said...

I am glad that you are feeling better, Vicki. Fall is actually my favorite time of year, and yet, with it quickly approaching I find myself a little sad. I feel like the sooner it starts, the sooner it will be over and than I will have to wait a whole other year until it comes around again. Tell me that makes any sense...

Victoria said...

It makes sense Maggie. I think we all are just really realizing how fast time flies by, whether it be child rearing or the passing of the seasons. Fall is usually my favorite time of the year too, as I tend to view it as the beginning of a new year, (left over from childhood school days) and a chance for a clean slate and a fresh start. (Plus the pretty colors, and wonderful smell to the air all make it wonderful. But fall around here always seems way too short, and that makes me sad.)

Rae said...

Vicki, glad you are feeling better. mommahood ain't easy! And I have that shirt too!!! The pic of you and the girls is lovely.